Stuff I truly believe with all my heart and soul

There a few things I am a strongly believe in. As often as possible I do them, and I'll keep doing them consciously till they become a way of life :-)
... I believe ... :

- We must be kind....regardless of whether we recieve it back or not
-We must be polite...regardless of whether the person we're talking to is or not
-We must help others...regardless of whether they help us back or not
-We must work for the greater good...for helping those who no one else wants to, for healing hurts, for reducing sorrow, for enriching the lives of others,for doing good stuff :-)
-We must pursue knowledge or how to better ourselves, our mental and spiritual reserves, for doing more God's work
-The truly wise, don't go about flaunting their wisdom.Nor do they make others feel inadequate.
-True wisdom comes with time, not by listening to lectures.
-True wisdom is never derived
-True wisdom needs no master,just an open mind
-True wisdom means knowing we know nothing
-True wisdom preaches not
-God is in us. Yes even in our bosses, whether we see it or not
-Everyone's good.
-God is in the little things. the sun the moon the rain the birds the kindnesses the compassion...the flowers dancing the stars twinkling
-Happiness lies in the small little things. someone calling to ask how you're doing...someone showing they care...the rain tapping on the window, a perfect cup of tea, a patient getting better, a baby laughing :)
-Show you care.Everyone in the world is having a hard time.Show then that you're there.
-Words matter...No one's a mind reader. The right words have the power to make or break a person. To make someone climb down the ledge or jump off it.
-Love deeply
-Be generous.
-don't let those younger to you pay!
-Show some compassion...any and everyone needs it
-Give everyone respect, regardless of whether you think they deserve it or not
-Don't shout at anyone, it is demeaning and painful
-Read a lot...about anything you're interested in.
-Lend a helping hand
-Stand up for those who cannot stand up for themselves.
-Never put another person's likes/dislikes/hopes/dreams down.
-Never act like you're better than anyone...no matter who you are, you're not.
-Be fair
-Expect nothing
-Just do,just give
-Take joy in other's smiles
-Never let anyone cry alone, regardless of what they say
-It's not by how many cars you have or expensive perfumes you own or branded clothes you wear that you matter. Thats just temporary...what matters is who did you help? Who did you go out of your way for? Did you help someone who you know cannot help you back? In anyway ? Mark of a person is his/her character. His/her habits.His/her compassion for the less fortunate.
-Don't boast about other's accomplishments as if they were you're own...its sad
-Be kind to animals
-Be extra nice to old people. They usually feel redundant.

Thats it for now folks.

You know you're secretly thinking of marriage when...

 Dedicated to my better half, and anyone else of marriageable age :-)

[Female point of view here].

- you surf the net looking for wedding pictures, any one's wedding pictures.

- you scan married people thoroughly looking for signs of happiness.

- you're bf/fiancee looks cuter everyday.

- you scour the www for wedding photographers.

- you secretly save up unusual wedding card designs.

- you find out the price of jewellery when out shopping for dishes.

- you know exactly what your ring should look like [and so does he :-) ].

- you know what kinds of dresses you will be wearing for your various functions.

[even if you don't know the colors yet]

- you chat with his Mom about what you'd like,what scares you or expectations.

- you can almost hear the sound of the music that will play as you prance down the red carpet.

- you can visualise the coffee table book of your pictures.

- you have mentally designed your home.

- you think of his family as your very own.

- the honeymoon stage of your relationship is over, you've been together for more than half a decade and you're still crazy about each other!

- Seeing other married people makes your stomach feel funny.

- wedding scenes or videos make you tear up.

- you and he make long term plans.

- you're looking forward to all the saris etc in your trousseau.

- you wonder about heels Vs flats with your outfits. You don't need heels as you're tall as it is, but they're glamorous. But there is the added risk of falling and being embarrassed...but somehow flats don't quite do it...

- you kind of know what flowers you want all over the place and they are so not roses.

- you know who you don't want there!!

- you wonder how long your honeymoon should last...and where your going.

- you so do not want a bun on your head.

- nor do you want the clown make up.

- in fact, to avoid looks related disasters , you've shortlisted looks and gone over them with him!

- you wonder if you'll hold hands while circling the fire... :-)

Let it be known this list could go on ad infinitum. But really its only an indicator of how ready you are to have a wedding, not a marriage... :-)

Why do people hate hospitals?

To me it has been home for a
long time. It's always been a place of wonder...

See, I don't understand why people hate hospitals...

majority of the sick people who go there recover. I always thought that was fantastic.

When did that stop being a good and wondrous thing ?

So we have to run around to get tests done and fees paid and everything seems so far apart... [you don't know what far is unless you've run around trying to get a patient discharged]. But the running around too is only to make one better, get tests, get reports... plus there is always the wheelchair for patients.

So the food sucks but...you win some you lose some. The Tea/coffee's not so bad...just make sure you ask them to give u 2 cups without water...there you go! Almost palatable!

There's always a JR to cater to your every need.

There's always a place to pray.

The beds are narrow and one has to be careful while turning...you don't want to roll right off.

No one enjoys being surrounded by sickness, festering wounds, fevers and etc. But take some comfort in the knowledge that they're being taken care of and will [God willing] recover...

for those who get sick watching blood... well you have it too you know...keeps you alive n kickin'! just beneath your skin.... ;)

I know its not a trip to the fun fair ... but a fun fair doesn't soothe your aches and pains and cure your illnesses does it ? Seems to me a trip to the hospital would sound better!!

Can it Ever Be too Late?

What do people mean when they say... hurry up before it's too late?

Too late for what?

And I don't mean a movie or dinner date.

Haven't you ever wondered, can it ever be too late?

"She's ageing, she should get married fast before it's too late!"

But isn't it better for her to get set, get ready, get prepared in whichever way she feels needed and then marry as opposed to just jump into a marriage with no clue whatsoever?!

OR

"She doesn't realise the guy she is going after is a big mistake...she's not listening to anyone, soon she will marry him and it will be too late!"

Too late to realise she made a big mistake? Or too late because sometimes marriages end in divorce and that is the real problem, according to society anyway?

Isn't it better that there is an option for divorce as opposed to a life filled with regrets and misery?

OR

"He let that government job opportunity go by. Now its too late to do anything...He's too fussy that's what."

Well...what's wrong in hopoing for the best, in desiring to do the best instead of just settling for whats easy? Following one's heart's desire is never easy...but its better than a lifetime of wondering what if...?

Who decides when its too late to learn a lesson?

In fact, Who the hell decided it's EVER too late to do what you want, be what you want, realise your dreams and live the life you desire for yourself?

I'd sure like to meet that person. Ask them a few questions of my own. Like who is anyone, to tell someone, that they better do things a certain way or else just expect the worst, because woe and behold, all hope is lost to them.

Just so you know, it isn't!

SO for anyone out there who feels it is, please know, its never the wrong time to do the right thing. and maybe somethings have to play out in a certain way, because it's destiny...but everything is fine, or will be soon. A lot of it, is in your hands.

For Men.

I'm utterly sick of the whole Women's day hullaballoo...all those lines about them having to undertake multiple roles, leading stressful lives, yadayadayada.

No one seems to make such a fuss over men. Instead they're cursed to the ends of the earth. It's a rare person or woman that stands up for them.

Seriously thought, Men don't have it that easy. Imagine their lives. From the time they're kids, the weight of parent's expectations are upon their head...in a more vocal manner than for girls. "Budhapey ka sahara" and all that. No one really expects that from a girl child, which, while somewhat insulting, is also oddly liberating. I mean, we'll do everything for our folks...but no one really expects it. In that sense, we're free.

And all this talk about women having to play different roles in society, in their lives, in the lives of others... makes me nauseous. We so martyr ourselves.

A Woman is a wife, a mother, a daughter, a daughter in law, a sister, a career person and so on ad infinitum...

Really one could counter that A Man is a husband, a son, a son in law, a co-bread winner [or not]...we forget family chauffeur, person to vent out feelings at, person getting stuck in the mom in law and daughter in law [saas, bahu, nanad] wars...the person with a million expectations on his head be it from his parents or his wife or his children...

So women have to shift families. But how many women give their husbands an easy time over that? Who gives them a break from their mother's rising insecurities about her position in her household?

Men are gentle too. They help too. Maybe they don't always cook dinner and maybe they kick up a fuss if somethings not cooked just right, but they get the groceries, they get the gas cylinder, they sometimes see their wife is tired and make her tea!

Maybe women spend more time with the kids. But men spend as much as they can too. When they're not running around doing bank work, paying bills, getting water, servicing the car...

When have we EVER let a man feel adequate???

Well this post is for them. You go...er...guys!

What Did you Do this YeAr ?

It's the morning of the Last Day Of The Year [as it shall henceforth be known] and I'm wondering where the year 2009 went?

I'm trying to recollect what I did, what I achieved, and try as I may my mind is a blank.

What did you do this year?

How did You make a difference?

Did you make a difference?

I think that is the scariest part...

Are you the same person you were last year?

Or did you evolve, perhaps defeat your vices?

Did you conquer you temper, kick that butt, throw the last bottle of bozze into the bin and never buy another?

Were you kind and compassionate?

Or did you leave that puppy with the broken leg out in the cold because... well there are so many such pups how many can we save?

Did you at least save the one you knew about?

Did you?

Did you try to improve your relationships with people?

Did you try to be honest with them?

Being honest is so hard. One never knows how someone else will respond does one?

Did you realise the perils of gossipping?

Did you try to see the good in people instead of bitching about their dark shades?

Did you try helping someone get ahead?

Even if it is in a goal you yourself want to succeed?

Did you give your shivering watchman a cup of tea without him asking?

Did you stand by your beloved in their times of need?

Even if they pushed you away?

Especially if they wanted to be left alone? No one really does you know.

Did you love them better than ever?

Even when they cursed you?

Especially when they cursed you.

Did you say what was on your mind and mean it?

To those who matter to you anyway.

Did you clear things up with people?

Doesn't it feel great?

Think, think of all you did, all you want to do and all you are capable of doing.

Then do it.

Think of what you are, what you really want to be and what you Can be.
Then Be.

Happy new years!

What DO women want?

Disclaimer : Feminists needn't take this post too seriously.

Saw What women want[Mel Gibson, Helen Hunt] for the upteenth. I just let movies play in the background sometimes, just so it feels like I'm not alone at home.

So anyway, I wondered...What do women want really? So naturally compiled a list!
Not all of you may want this stuff but some of it, sometimes...I'm sure!

- A home, just ours.
- Flowers [always, for no reason!]
- Calorie free Junk food.
- Better nooky [thats right.]
- A better figure [slimmer/fuller as applicable].
- To be less hard on ourselves.
- Someone [not our parents] who loves us just the way we are.
- Someone who supports our career choices, even when we're unsure ourselves.
- Someone who's loyal no matter who challenges us.
- Help around the house.
- Appreciation for managing a career, a family and a home.
- Equal help in doing the same.
- Less pressure to be perfect. No pressure, more like it.
- A real friend. The kind who always has our back.
- No grey hair/signs of ageing.
- No body hair [apart from head whereupon it should be plentiful.]
- A partner whos nice, with a hint of spice!
- An expression of what they mean to people.
- Honesty.
- Sincerety.
- To not have to judge any and every person they interact with.
- To not be judged all the time.
- To not have messy family affairs thrust upon them.
- To have their kids realise their mom's love them more than anything in the world and only want whats best for them.
- No menstrual cycles, or menopause. They both suck.
- Spontaneity.
- The time to weave day dreams.
- Style.
- Clothes that look brilliant on us.
- Heels that cause no long or short term pains whatsoever.
- To be pampered, to be coddled and to not have to be tough all the time.
- To not care if the in laws treat one like their own daughter or not. We have our own parents you know.
- No pain during childbirth. C'mon women are alone there, other than the drugs, nothing helps really.
- Someone who loves us to notice when we're tired or headachy or PMSing or cranky and make us a hot cup of tea/coffee. without us saying a word. Yes...we do want mind readers.
- Actual confidence. [Pretending is one thing...]
- To drink and not have people raise their eyebrows.
- To have sex before marriage and not have our character and morals questioned.
- A good night's sleep. Without an alarm.
- To not have to haggle with every vendor possible.
- For our past not to matter.
- For our education to matter more than our skin tone. Our looks.
- For our kindness to matter more than our ability to flatter, manipulate and etc.
- hugs. Sponaneous ones!
- Chocolate.
- To have a star named after us.
- To be taken care of when we're sick. [Not by a nurse in a hospital.]
- To be able to focus when driving.
- To be able to show our weakness, our anger, our frustration, our grief.
- For every kiss to remind us of our first :) [ok I made that up, its just me.]

Among other things... :)