W hat little I know of love is this...

It’s mutual.

If not it’s probably not meant to be.

What I mean is, I don’t think the creator of love ever intended it to go unrequited.

You can’t live without the one you love.

If you can, it’s probably not love at all.

Because you can’t really learn to love someone else. Its not programming.

All that you want, when you’re in love, is to see the one you love happy.

When your loved one cries, or is sad, or in pain you feel your heart is breaking into tiny shards.

You’ll do anything to make them happy.

You’ll love the bald patches and extra flab on the person and personality.

Time spent doing nothing with them will also count as an amazing date!

No one will understand how you always have so much to talk about over the phone and otherwise.

A hug or loving words from them make worries disappear.

When they have a cold, their sniffles break your heart.

When they take you out, or pay for you, you’re mentally calculating because you don’t want them to waste money on you.

When they’re tired, you just kiss their forehead and give them a squeeze.

When they come home from work, you run towards them with a hug, ready and waiting.

You look out for them, from the balcony or windows.

If he is among a group of guests, whom you are making tea [or anything]for, you make it just the way he likes it, other guests be damned! Even if the others don’t like it, as long as he does, your missions accomplished.

Their opinion is what matters.

You would die before you let them hurt.

You may not always agree with each other, but you’ll listen to each other.

You can take them for granted, in a way you can’t anyone else, because, they will understand. Whatever it is, they’re on your side. Simply put, they’re an extension of your own self.

You miss them as soon as they leave.

You can’t bear to see them drive or walk away.

[Even if you will see them again soon.]

When you’re at war with them, nothing, no matter how awesome, feels good. At least not until you kiss and make up.

You pray for each other, all the time. Every single time you pray.

Somehow, you always think of them as your baby.

It’s impossible to stay angry at them.

You’ll watch impossibly boring movies for each other, Just to be together.

You want them to take the yummiest bits of chicken, the cream off the coffee and etc.

They’re the only ones who can convince you to do anything.

They’re the ones your mom goes to, to complain about you![sad but true.]

Because they’re the ones you listen to unconditionally.[like your mom said to.]

You dress for them, change hairstyles for them, shave your beard in special ways for them.

You don’t require external validation, like marriage or approval or understanding...from others.

You know the deepest, darkest parts of each other.

Yet you want to be together!

QuOtE :

"Common sense is the world's biggest misnomer."
-Sweta Singh, 22yrs, when she was an undergraduate student. inspired to post it here by Rush.me's blogpost here.

Rom Com’s = Relationship malfunction.

Of late, a lot of people have been coming up with articles, which if the movie industry were to take seriously, would spell the end of infinite chick flicks better known as “Romantic Comedies” or Rom Com’s.

Yeah, those things can be pretty fatal to a relationship. Even the most sensible of girls can be induced to believe that the things shown in these movies ACTUALLY happen. After a few glasses of wine/breezers, no one in the world seems as amazing as that fella who just seems to be willing to sacrifice everything for “the one”. Their jobs, their bank balance, their self respect, their ego and sometimes even their sanity!

It’s odd how much can be fitted into 90 minutes...it’s all just crammed in there, the meeting, the understanding, the magical whirlwind romance, the falling in true love, the misunderstand and the sudden realisation- usually by the guy- of his follies and the most fantastical attempts to make up.

No wonder girls in real life are frustrated! I mean, you can be with a guy for years and years just waiting...for something romantic, no correcting, waiting for magic to happen...and it doesn’t...do you know why? Because there’s no such thing as real magic...it’s all about optical illusion.

In real life, guys don’t make childhood dreams of going to the “prom” come true.

Nor do they tattoo their girlfriend’s names on their arms for the world to see. Ok maybe Saif Ali Khan did it, but let’s face it; he can afford to pay for laser or plastic surgery to have it erased at a later date if required.

They also don’t cook foreign cuisines or bake cheesecakes and serve them with wine to a girlfriend just to give her a break. Nikhil makes me tea sometimes and I’m impressed enough with that.

[One time I was really sick with fever and cough, he cooked me magi, coffee and brought home a comedy to watch just so I’d feel pampered. Oh no wait, he knew I hate maggi so he got top ramen and I know he looooves butter maggi so I’d ordered maggi and butter from the grocery. I thought it was cute, the mutual thoughtfulness. He cooked and served and fed me and though I couldn’t eat much, I felt really pampered. He even bought medicines, and gave them to me with water. He took Google down for a really long walk so I wouldn’t have to be bothered and could just rest. He left me some petty cash so I wouldn’t have to get up and go to the ATM.]

My mom and all the family friend aunties and female relatives who are married-old and young- all say the same thing. When a husband is ill, wives wait on them hand and foot, give them tea infinite times, and soup and their medicines in their hands, make special dishes to please them, cover them up with warm blankets and in general make sure they don’t have to get up off their butts. And when the wives are ill, the thoughtful and intelligent husbands say, “you really should see a doctor or at least take some medicine for that fever/cold & cough/headache/backache/anasarca/congestive cardiac failure/pregnancy mood fluctuations/PMS/epileptic fit...okay that’s taking it too far.”

Chooo chweet of them husbands innit?

No one really sends dozens of expensive, long stemmed red roses internationally, not unless they’re using cash as toilet paper. [Forgive the crudity]

Or giant freaking teddy bears.

Or cheesy but sweet gold rings with each other’s names entwined.

Or plan secret romantic getaways.

Or plan secret romantic anything’s really...! It’s usually the girls who do that stuff.

I’ve taken a lot of flights. Since the age of 1yr I’ve been flying internationally and domestically. On a plane naturally, I’m in no position to be uplifted aerobically. And in all these years, I’ve yet to see a guy running past security to catch the girl who is leaving forever and ever to America [usually...or else to the end of the world.]...and who is stopped by mere declarations of deepest love or by a song or two or by a moment of “eye contact.”

Geez I can never believe these chicks that let go of an international flight ticket...costing like thousands of bucks. Ok so he loves you, he’ll still love you if you go, have a fun trip, get an education and then return! Why waste a Daddy given opportunity to see the world?

The point is these rom coms put unrealistic pressure on relationships...guys expect their girls to be that “hot” and girls expect them to be that sensitive.

Guys: Those girls are more often than not, anorexic. That’s not good.

Girls: those aren’t real guys. Those are just screenplay writers who’re paid thousand of bucks to come up with romantic SAP!

The sad, unfair, ironical part?

The few guys, who are romantic, waste it on girls who play hard to get, who have no respect for flowers or feelings! [If you knew the number of times my heart broke seeing huge bouquets of flowers dumped outside girl’s rooms in the hostel. I’ve never had flowers delivered to my room or left at the reception where all the other girls would oooh and ahhh over who Sweta’s admirer could be?] These chicks would parade their flowers/cards/love letters and then unceremoniously dump the guys and the stuff both...once everyone knew that they were in demand that is.

I feel awfully sorry for these guys. They are so sensitive...they go all out in expressing their feelings be it in words, or cards or songs or radio broadcasts or newspaper declarations or gifts...only to be rejected. Not all of them. In a perfectly cheesy world, this stuff works.

Oops...got to go, Nikhil’s just landed on my roof in a ... oh my God! In a helicopter...and oh wow...he’s leaning out of it in a tux with a bowtie and a long stemmed red rose between his teeth!! Probably come to surprise me and whisk me off to Europe and far, far away from examinations! Can’t miss this people...so see ya later!

NiKhiL's ToPsY tUrVy DaY!

This post is written at the request of my better half, Mr. Nikhil Thakur. He had a lousy day and felt everything was messed up and wanted to write about it but found he could not, so he asked me to write it out for him. Posting it here was my idea. If he had a blog, he would have posted it himself!

I think I got up from the wrong side of the bed this morning. I was late for work. My shift was tiring...6:30 Pm to 3:30 Am. Usually I get free around 4:ooAm and am sitting in a cab home by 4:15Am and am home and in bed by 5:45Am, mostly because of the lack of traffic at that ungodly hour. Just BPO employees and other companies working in collaboration with the U.S.A...Indians are not quite human see, if we had more money, a better infrastructure and “power” than the US, it would be the American’s who would be staying awake as per IST [Indian standard time]. Then again, Indian’s can solve their own computer [and other] related issues themselves thank you very much. Itna dimaag bachche bachche ke paas hain yahaan...paisa nahi toh kya?

Anyway, this particular day was scary. I’ve joined this new company 5 months ago and we are still on probation. Our training period was nearly over, just 4 days to go before we officially go “on the floor” as Associate Network Engineers. Boy were we excited! That is until our trainer came in today and informed us that not all 20 of us would be going on the floor...only those whose “performance graphs” had gone from the down to up direction, or those whose graphs were up and down and up and down...would be allowed to proceed further. Those whose graphs went downward in a steady way would probably be, well, fired.

A few minutes later, he said, well no actually, we’ve spent a lot of time and money training you so I guess no one will be fired actually, maybe transferred into another training program...no no, probably not fired.

Now I’m a hard worker and right from the beginning I worked really hard because this was and is my dream job and my big break. I was, for the first time ever, at the top of my class...which is why my girlfriend said, there was nowhere left to go but down! While I did not plummet down, others came up, and I was sometimes up, sometimes down...but I thought I was doing fairly well...that is until Mr. trainer kept looking at me and saying this stuff...then again, I was sitting right in his line of vision...and he did say that just because he was looking at me while saying this stuff didn’t mean he was talking about me.

Talk about confusion!

And tension.

Due to the petrol/diesel strike, the company was trying to save money on the fuel and so our cab was delayed by 2.5hours while we just sat there, exhausted, sleepy, tense and cold.

Because we just happened to be present at the office, huddled inside in an attempt to get warm, our boss came over and asked us to pick up extra cases for no extra money! What a treat!! Makes one appreciate the value of overtime eh? Dream job or not, ones mind does tire.

At 6:30Am we finally set off, traffic had begun and then, Voila! The clutch started acting up, behaving badly and in general refusing to work as it should! The gears were not changing...once we stopped the jeep was not able to restart in first gear.

I was tired. It seemed everything was going wrong.

Then there was the whole India –Pakistan- terrorist- blame- shifting- game going on. Not that I’m a diehard patriot...but I do worry about, this mess...these blasts, these deaths...People’s lives are at stake and no place is safe because of some other people’s misguided ideas of right and wrong. Why weren’t we doing anything? Why were we just passing the baton? What are the rulers of these two countries “talking” about since TIME IMMEMORIAL!? How is it that AFTER ALL THIS TIME NO SOLUTION HAS BEEN REACHED?? When it has been confirmed that the captured “terrorist” is indeed from Pakistan, why is nothing still being done? Where are the fellow’s parents? One day they’re on TV giving bytes to the World, the next day they’re hidden from human sight? Why should India create a huge noise about a Hotel blown up in another country? It’s that country that should DO something, investigate, find out a solution...we are responsible for what is ours. How can we kick up a fuss about something related to you when you yourself are not bothered?

What was going on with the world? Diesel strikes, terrorism, inflation, a faulty clutch...

Oh we’re off again, clutch working now! Can’t wait to get home!

Plus some of the guys at work were talk about Nostradamus and they said that Doomsday is rapidly approaching!

Just what this world needs!

As told to Sweta Singh.

Fun in the meagre Sun

There they are...my two favorite ladies basking in the winter sun, eating peanuts.
Mom fasts on Mondays and this is her morning ritual, Tea and peanuts...Googles ritual is to harass mom into giving her a few peanuts with the shell...she chews up the peanuts and spits out the shell.
Some small pleasures are so sweet.just watching them makes me smile so.

a cute picture.

My uber faithful study companion.
Google in her chair with a blanket. She sits or sleeps there till I'm done studying for the night...Sometimes if shes too deeply asleep or lazy to get up and into her own house to sleep, I pick her up and carry her and settle her in her own bed.
:o) Its a real comfort to know someones sitting next to me while I slog.

Destiny versus Karma- an Answer at last!

I can be so preposterous, not to mention presumptuous sometimes! Consider this for example. At 10:15PM on 9th Jan, 2009, I was studying, but anxiously. I am to leave Delhi for 10 days at the end of the month to give exams in Bangalore. I was worried as to where and with whom I could leave my Google safely. Not to mention free or nearly free of cost as I am not earning and my folks don’t support my love for animals of any sort.

Then it occurred to me, about this lady who lives above our flat with her husband, son and MIL [the latter two like dogs a lot]. I have only ever had one good, long chat with her around Diwali time...over exchange of sweets. I wished it could have gone on but was not feasible at the time. Thereafter whenever I’d see her or run into her...I always noticed her smiling. Not like a loon! A real, genuine smile. She looks 15yrs younger than she actually is, which is why when she told me her real age I was literally stunned into silence. [Rude I know but still!].

She seems...free.

Late as it was a voice inside kept nagging at me...to go go just go and you’ll see why...and so I went. And once inside I was there for the better part of an hour and what an enjoyable hour it was. Turns out she was awake-studying. Doing a v.well respected PG degree course from a good college and had exams over the weekend. But she was so warm and hospitable I didn’t feel like leaving. When I asked her if it would be feasible for her to keep Google for 10days she ACTUALLY CONSIDERED IT. Meaning she didn’t gasp in disbelief and say it was “no no, impossible.” Like so many others do.

But I digress...We talked about a lot of stuff. And that talk relieved a lot of the anxiety I’d been feeling about PG entrances, the future...What’s in my kismet? IS there a kismet? She even answered what was confusing me about whether there is such a thing as destiny or is it allll just about slogging...

She said...Destiny is what you will get regardless of how much or little work you put it...regardless of everything...it’s the “bare minimum”... Now karma is the ladder you climb upon to get something over and above your destiny. Sort of like “destiny + bonus”. And worrying never pays because it’s a manifestation of “doubt” which, apart from being a mood killer, destroys faith and doesn’t let good things come to you.
That made total sense...
Doubt -> worry -> distribution of primary focus -> faith reduction -> pessimism ... and good things never happen to pessimists!

She even had good things to say about her MIL, a first for me...I’ve never heard a DIL say anything good about her MIL and vice versa. This was a pleasant change. Made me a little less worried about marriage and adjustment :o)

She told me how she doesn’t take things – work or studies- to be a burden...or anything for that matter. That explained why she felt and looked free... problems, she said and worries come but you have to deal with them, destroy them or delegate them... :-D

If you don’t like what you are doing –say, for a living- do not do it. But if you are going to do it, you would be better off if you learnt to like it! She said she was less, much less confused now than she had been before...more calm, relaxed and thus able to enjoy life.

Now I never have role models, but this lady was setting a very good example of how best to live and how to really live and not let life get in the way of living. It’s not every day one comes across such a person... I don’t write about individuals [the last time I wrote about Google], but there’s always a first time... and this lady has so impressed me. At 11pm, when I finally left, I was lighter of heart and mind...Problem not yet solved...but I knew it would be one way or another. Sooner or later, and my worrying wouldn’t help.
[Also my mom, who doesn't like going to meet people just for chats...came back from her place one day all smiles...regretting only that she[the lady] was too busy to possible chat with daily :) Mom never says that about anyone!]

And that was a relief! I felt free, more so than I was when I’d arrived. And she invited me for coffee too!

Freebie Fiesta!!!

I share a very special relationship with the word Free. It makes my world go round and my heart do crazy flip flops. It puts a mile wide smile on my countenance and a glide in my stride...!

It doesn’t even matter What the free item in question is...its utility, requirement...all that simply ceases to matter once the F-word is attached to it.

I remember all the free movie tickets I won, simply due to my persistence in calling the radio station offering them! I won 7 pairs of free tickets...1 pair which i couldn’t pick up. [ nearly killed me that did]. 2 pairs I gave away. Only 1 of which was used. [ nearly killed me as I watched that.]

I won free meal passes to an amazing Mediterranean restaurant and took my boyfriend and ate nearly Rs.2500 worth of food.[well no, left my Rs.500 Risotto, broke my heart.]I was so full of joy that afternoon that the waiters were all smiles at my enthusiasm...this is the picture of how happy I was that everything was free! I even ordered salad!!

It amazes me that people complain about their jobs...especially jobs wherein one of the perks are freebies...even if it just a free [or unlimited free] cups of coffee.

There are people who get not just coffee, but also other things. Pens, for instance. Or stationery. Or notepads...

It doesn’t matter that the F-stuff has sponsors names stamped all over them. The point is ... one doesn’t have to pay for them. At all!! What more can you ask for?

When I’m in the market and see the magic word, my feet automatically walk towards it and my fingers point and I yell in barely suppressed glee! I forget my age, designation, companions as I nearly race towards the sign.

And what about those who get free books or ipods or computers or laptops or USB coffee warming plates or even free blank sheets of paper or coffee mugs and thermoses or bags or handbags or even flowers or perfumes or watches or clocks or mobile phone holders or coffee coasters or pencil holders or free movie tickets or free meals or free...whew. Anything.

I remember once when I was an intern in our college hospital, the medical representative wasn’t giving away free stuff to us I yelled at the whole bunch of them. They were so scared they flooded us with notepads! And pens too.

Imagine getting all this stuff AND getting paid to do your job as well!? Whats to complain about? LG- Life is GOOOOOD!!