For the past week, it feels every things been just so so WRONG.

take any and in fact, everything.

nothing I'm reading is getting retained.
I'm homesick.
I've been sick.
I got assaulted by 2 auto drivers.
My relationships are going through a lousy phase. All of them.
I'm so losing hope.

compounding to or maybe due to all this... I'm very very sleep deprived. I just wanna go to bed and make a fresh start. Patch things up. Plug all the leaky holes. I just want to wake up to a good day. Is that so much to ask... ?

I want to go home, but, see I have some things to do... I want to return home as a person my parents want me to be. I want to be healthy, diligent, fit and ... calmer. I have to... I'm tired of being taken care of and worried about by my folks. Want to give them reassurance slightly similar to the one they have given me. so I've set me a target... a pretty serious one. Giving my self till august. to get healthy. in every possible way.

maybe its hormones, maybe its the "RETURN OF THE LARD, the re-gaining of lost weight!!"
maybe its just ... lack of motivation.
A sad realization that... the more you go out of your way to be appreciated/liked/loved... the more you get taken for granted.

I miss my mom. and my dad. and my family which is basically them. I miss times before I had gone for college. and become a huge... literally and figuratively a mess... physically, mentally, academically. I'd gone and become a complete underachiever. me. who was always among the top 5 in my class. ALWAYS.

this week has been probably the worst since I've come back to Delhi. Alone.

I think I'll go , play with my dog, Google. She makes me feel, like I'm being so nice to her even if all I do is pet her, every once in half and hour. play with her. No grudges... nothing. no secrets.

maybe in my next life.
or the next.
in my next life, I'm reincarnating as a 3 toed sloth. Keep it simple ya know.

my PrincE... Mr.Charming :o]

Who doesn't have an idea in their mind or a picture of what their perfect mate would be like? Actually meeting them isn't really important, thats only for the very lucky...
Nonetheless we all have an idea... maybe even a list [secret] of qualities we would like our prospective partner should have... or at least partly have... or have the potential of having... wordplay, I love it...!

I too have a list...wanna see? Don't judge me!
My perfect guy should be the following :
1.] Male [I mean, all man! You recall the saying...I like my men to be men? yes well, thats what I mean.]must also be taller than me even if only by an inch.
2.] older to me [and I don't mean elderly... I don't go for older men. I mean just older enough, to be at the same level or higher up in terms of maturity than me.]
3.] College educated with a proper degree [I need some kind of financial stability, Yes my money will be our money but his money should also contribute towards our money getting me?]
4.] Normal looking. No major bodily shocks.
5.] Must have a valid driver's license.[I find driving v.sexy.]
6.] Must not be a sissy.
7.] or a Mamma's boy.
8.] Must like reading and books and stories.
9.] Must not prohibit me from pursuing things which are not harmful.
10.] Must be able to calm me down when I'm in a rage.[ meaning he must not fly into a rage himself,not while I'm still pissed.]
11.] Must have a sense of adventure.
12.] and maybe a body piercing, nothing shocking, a ear will do.
13.] Not color blind.
14.] must have good hands.literally and figuratively.
15.] MUST LOVE ANIMALS AND ALLOW ME TO KEEP LOADS OF THEM IN OUR HOME.
16.] Must like movies enough to sit through them and maybe discuss them later.
17.] Non smoker, occasional consumption of alchohol, 150ml/week as is found out to be beneficial for the heart.
18.] Must not be a goody-goody.
19.] Must love my craziness.
20.] Must be appreciative.
21.] Must get me flowers when the pocket doesn't protest.
22.] Must indulge my love for coffee.
23.] Must take my demand for a bathtub as a wedding present seriously.
24.] Must faithfully read what I write. even of no one else does.
25.] Must listen to me when he is ill and take his meds on time. Must trust my opinion as a Doctor and not 2nd guess me unless I'm 2nd guessing myself.

.... A lot to ask isn't it?? But I'm lucky lucky and so spoilt. My man spoils me so and pampers me so... And he fulfills approximately 95% of the list... hell at time even the whole list!!!

Wanted....tall, slim, fair...?

so everyone reads matrimonial ads... and enjoys them! Pretty amazing pieces of fiction aren't they? Amusing, to say the least. Going by them, I'd be forced to think the only people who DO get married and live happily ever after are as follows :
1.] Tall
2.] Fair
3.] Slim
4.] Smart
5.] 5' 6"
6.] professionally qualified
7.] Tall
8.] Fair
9.] slim
10.] beautiful
11.] handsome

oh,oh oops...er am I repeating myself? well, that's exactly what happens in the papers... after awhile you know nearly exactly what the next ad is going to say... they all sound the same...!

For once I'd like to see an ad that reads such "wanted, normal height, average looking, presentable bride/groom for equally normal, average looking, man/woman.

or better if it was allowed, I'd send this in as a joke... " wanted midget, loon, with excess body hair and no desire for removal of the same, face like a frog, waist like a balloon, teeth like apples with worms a-peeking from the holes, lazy ass bitch for wedding!!! "

yeah... that would be fun...
what about all the others? The not so tall, regular people with flaws... imperfections... not that different from the ones placing the adverts... they get married too don't they... eventually... and probably happily too.

when the family is aware of the prospective bride/groom's flaws, its probably easier for everyone involved... that way, no surprises are involved and the family can adjust well to the new member, making it easier for the new person to adjust in turn!
how much of that made sense?

See, its better not to hide whats wrong with you, as its not something one can do in the long run... its better to be yourself, right from the start... be proud of your 'baddies' as much as you maybe of your good points, cos its the wrongs that make one human...